Seriously??

OK, I know I just posted something a few hours ago. And, by posting again so soon, it may appear as though I do nothing at my job all day. But, some stories are just too important to let go without being told.

This morning, Bucky arrives at work and speaks to me. He hasn't spoken a word to me since he stole my hamburger. Oh, well, he did speak to me once a week or so ago when he tried to tell me that I have no business giving people a hard time for complaining about stuff when I am Dysfunctional Office's number one complainer. I told him I might dish it out, but at least I could take it. Unlike him. That shut him up fast and he hasn't spoken to me since. Until this morning.

This morning Bucky walks right up to me and wants to know what time Shaggy arrived at the office yesterday. As I arrive at 6 a.m., I'm usually the first one here. I told Bucky we both arrived at the same time. Then he wanted to know if I ACTUALLY saw Shaggy drive into the parking lot. I told Bucky I really wasn't paying attention. I had other things on my mind, such as my vacation countdown. So here is what happened:

Bucky bought a new road bike over the weekend. So, of course, the first thing anyone does when they buy a new bicycle is bring it into their office to store it. Bucky has his wages garnished and always has creditors calling here looking for him, but somehow he came up with the money to buy a new bike. As he told me this morning "You of all people know how serious I am about my ironman training." First off, I don't know how serious he is about it and secondly, I don't care. But, that is neither here nor there. Back to the facts.

He brings his brand new sparkling perfect $800 bike into the office to store. Monday was Cinco De Mayo so he goes out drinking after work and comes back to Dysfunctional Office at 8:00. Don't ask me why, but I'm starting to suspect he is living here again. That's right, I said again. Sometime between 8:00 Monday night and 6:00 Tuesday morning, someone took his precious bike for a joy ride and wrecked it.

Bucky suspects Shaggy and thinks he got to work around 5:30 am rode the bike, wrecked the bike, then sat in his car until I arrived so it looked like we got there at the same time and I would be his alibi.

Now, Bucky realizes there is nothing he can do at this point. His bike is wrecked and he is just going to have to accept that. All he asks is that Shaggy come clean about his crime. Just be a man and fess up already. I told Bucky I knew how important it was for someone to come clean why they have wronged another person in the office. Do you think Bucky took that opportunity to come clean with me? Do you? Do you really? No, of course he didn't. He has more important matters on his mind.

Now, he is trying really hard not to be paranoid about this but either Shaggy is to blame or someone broke into the office in the middle of the night and wrecked his bike. My theory is Bucky had a bit too much cerveza on Cinco De Mayo and wrecked it himself.